Letting Go Then Letting Go Again And Again No Saint Jennifer

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· 153 ratings · 33 reviews

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Jun 14, 2018 USOM rated it really liked it

(Disclaimer: I received this free book from the publisher. This has not impacted my review which is unbiased and honest.)

The ominous thriller tone is established from the very beginning. This undercurrent pulls you along the whole story, making you need to figure out who the killer is. The premise along gets you, but what ended up keeping me was the character of Emily. Emily is entirely intriguing because while the struggles of Emily are unique, the challenges she deals with are also universal -

(Disclaimer: I received this free book from the publisher. This has not impacted my review which is unbiased and honest.)

full review: https://utopia-state-of-mind.com/revi...

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Aug 13, 2018 Carolyn rated it it was amazing

Disclaimer: I did NOT receive a copy for in exchange for a review. I paid full price and preordered this book the day I knew it was going to be sold on Amazon because I have been a huge fan of the author's writing since she published Secular Homeschooling Magazine almost a decade ago. So my disclaimer is nothing more than an assurance that this review is fair and factual.

So, did the reality of this novel meet my admittedly quite high expectation? Without a doubt. Witty, sharp, intelligent writin

So, did the reality of this novel meet my admittedly quite high expectation? Without a doubt. Witty, sharp, intelligent writing combined with unusual literary techniques make this novel fresh and completely opposite of so many first novels that are "formulaic." I also applaud Ms. Markus on her ability to engage the reader with language that you can literally fall into and lose yourself in.

Some of the lines I particularly liked:

"She thought most poetry was boring, trite, or pretentious—sometimes all three, if the poet really worked at it."

"It's impossible to look behind silence for all the lies that might be hiding there."

"It was a million o'clock at night and everyone in the world was asleep and I was obviously only in the library because I wanted to be alone, so naturally M strutted in like she owned the damned place. I glared at her as best I could on short notice."

"I can't stop thinking about what happened to him." So none of the rest of us gets to stop thinking about it, either. Thanks. "You have to stop thinking about that," Lucy commanded. I'd kind of love it if Lucy decided to become a therapist. If anyone can verbally bludgeon the world into a state of timid sanity, it'll be Lucy."

I'll be looking forward to this author's second novel with anticipation.

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Aug 11, 2018 Jaymie rated it liked it

This was not a good fit for me. There wasn't enough suspense throughout the story - only at the end. The first section/"chapter" went on for ages, jumped around in time, and didn't seem to be going anywhere related to the plot of a girl who seems targeted by a murderer killing everyone she gets close to. I was disappointed in this one. This was not a good fit for me. There wasn't enough suspense throughout the story - only at the end. The first section/"chapter" went on for ages, jumped around in time, and didn't seem to be going anywhere related to the plot of a girl who seems targeted by a murderer killing everyone she gets close to. I was disappointed in this one. ...more

This book is so unique and different, and I had no idea I would enjoy it as much as I did when I decided to read it. The Letting Go by Deborah Markus is a thought provoking story about a girl who believes she is not allowed to have anyone or anything she loves.

Emily is a loner, not because she wants to be, but because she has to be. You see, everyone (and everything-pets included), that she loves, is brutally murdered. Emily has finally figured out the rules: don't get too close to any living th

Holing herself up in an artistic boarding school, Emily is viciously cruel to everyone that crosses her path. But this is for their own benefit. She doesn't want them to end up like her mother, father, best friend, or dog. At school, Emily focuses on the one thing that she loves that cannot be taken away from her: Emily Dickinson. Emily Dickinson is already dead, and words cannot be killed, so this is the one thing Emily allows herself to embrace and love.

But when a dead body turns up on the steps of the boarding school, Emily is convinced that it has to do with her, even though she never knew the dead man. Has she made a mistake? Was she wrong about the rules? And just as this is happening, another girl at the school insists on getting close to Emily at the possible expense of her own life. What can Emily do to stop all the death around her?

I loved everything about this book. From the poetry interspersed throughout to Emily's introspective and meticulous thought process, I was captured from the first page. It actually took me a while to get through this read, not because it was dull or boring, but because it made me think so much and I had to keep putting the book down to reflect.

I was a huge fan of the lesbian romance in this book, and loved that it was subtle and not at all pushy. This is definitely not a love story, and this element was not the focus of the plot. The twist really got me as well, and normally I can see these things coming from a mile away! Overall, this was a very unusual and unique read that I can definitely see myself revisiting in the future.

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 Stars

A huge thanks to Sky Pony Press for an advanced copy of this fantastic read!

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Apr 16, 2018 Alisa Ellie rated it really liked it

"The end would be as easy as letting go."

In spite of gloomy and tragic circumstances of the story, the author managed to trick my mood and emotions with a smart narration style. It's not abstruse but still made me ponder over the same sentence again and again. The language is catchy and involving. The book is easy to read, but it still keeps me company and makes me feel passionate about it every day more and more.

I liked the characters very much. They appeared to be loving and of a big heart

"The end would be as easy as letting go."

I liked the characters very much. They appeared to be loving and of a big heart, loyal and selfless. They teach you by their example to be forgiving and tolerate, to sympathize and support even in the darkest times. They show what it means to love someone unconditionally.

Deborah Markus skillfully tangled Emily Dickinson's life and oeuvre into the story providing the heroine with an anchor to hold to while her life's never been ordinary and not without loss. So even the avid fan of the poetess will be intrigued and carried away with little-known facts of her life. So yes, for those of you who want to find a pleasant surprise on the pages of the book, have a nice time and simply enjoy the moment of reading, pay attention to this story. I believe it's exactly what we need from time to time.

I want to say thank you, Skyhorse Publishing, for the ARC of this book. I truly enjoyed every page.

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Oct 29, 2018 Melissa rated it liked it

Way too much exposition about Emily Dickinson's life, not nearly enough exposition about Emily The Main Character's Life. I think the diary style does this book a great disservice, because we only get to know what our main character feels like writing about and she is certainly not forthcoming. There are odd jumps forward in time with no explanation until later on, and the entire second part is a jumble of several weeks to months worth of memories in no particular order. Getting the happy ending Way too much exposition about Emily Dickinson's life, not nearly enough exposition about Emily The Main Character's Life. I think the diary style does this book a great disservice, because we only get to know what our main character feels like writing about and she is certainly not forthcoming. There are odd jumps forward in time with no explanation until later on, and the entire second part is a jumble of several weeks to months worth of memories in no particular order. Getting the happy ending payoff before the climax completely ruined the end of the book for me. The Big Reveal also was very... not foreshadowed? Out-of-nowhere, hard to believe.

Still three stars though, because the romance is sweet and rare, the premise is interesting, and the whole thing has a very gothic, literary style that's pretty nice (it has a very Jane Eyre vibe somehow) and ultimately I did read the whole thing and I only skimmed a little.

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The Letting Go is a campus novel. Our protagonist, Emily, has an obsession with Emily Dickinson – who history has recorded as having an obsession with death – much like our protagonist, Emily. Confused?

I really thought I would enjoy The Letting Go. Yes, I bought it on the strength of the book cover – an act that has burned me many times before. However, the story is told in a really disorienting choppy way that made me feel like I couldn't keep up with what was going on. When the main dramatic m

For a story which seemed to have a lot of potential…based on the cover…it had a really disappointing execution.

The Letting Go by Deborah Markus is available now.

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May 07, 2019 Jen rated it did not like it

Emily's mother was murdered when she was young. She's now spending her days in boarding school, focused on her love of Emily Dickinson. She just wants to lose herself in Dickinson's writing and be left alone. But, when a corpse appears on the steps of the school and a new girl insists on becoming Emily's friend, she finds that she can't stay apart any longer.

I had a really hard time with this book. Emily was boring and her obsession with Dickinson was annoying. The fact that her family was murde

I had a really hard time with this book. Emily was boring and her obsession with Dickinson was annoying. The fact that her family was murdered was the most interesting thing about her but it was barely discussed. The plot twist at the end seemed to come out of nowhere and to me felt completely random and tossed in for effect with no build up or back story. Not worth reading.

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Aug 25, 2018 Tiffany ✨ rated it did not like it

The writing style was meh and none of the characters really blow me away. This book was a real struggle for me to get through because I was really bored. The second half of the book was better but it wasn't enough to keep me interested.

Emily was a boring protagonist and her obsession with Emily Dickinson got annoying after a while but what disappointed me the most was the fact that there was no mystery in the book until the very end. The plot twist felt random and had no buildup. The best part about the book was Emily's relationship with M. In fact, M was the best part of the novel. Everything else was meh and boring.

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I had a real tough time with this book. It took me probably 25-30 pages to realize it was written in diary format, and it was extremely slow to get into otherwise. I was expecting suspense all the way through, and I just didn't get that. I also wish that I knew more about Emily's history from the beginning, because not knowing details made it difficult for me to like her as a character. I had a real tough time with this book. It took me probably 25-30 pages to realize it was written in diary format, and it was extremely slow to get into otherwise. I was expecting suspense all the way through, and I just didn't get that. I also wish that I knew more about Emily's history from the beginning, because not knowing details made it difficult for me to like her as a character. ...more

Jan 24, 2021 Mina rated it liked it

I would rate this a 3.5 if I could. Most of it was exposition for me, and there wasn't a lot of romance, which was what I was expecting, but the characters were pretty good. I would rate this a 3.5 if I could. Most of it was exposition for me, and there wasn't a lot of romance, which was what I was expecting, but the characters were pretty good. ...more

There are some small spoilers in this review but not enough for me to want to mark it as spoilers. Read at own risk!

This book was such a pleasant surprise for me. We all know I have a habit of not reading the synopsis of a book before I read therefore having no idea what I'm getting into while I'm reading. Personally, I kind of like it that way. I like the surprise and being able to try and guess what's going on without having any prior information.

That wasn't this case with this. I did read the

There are some small spoilers in this review but not enough for me to want to mark it as spoilers. Read at own risk!

That wasn't this case with this. I did read the synopsis! But its was wonderfully vague as to what happens in the book so I was still on the edge of my seat and basically begging for Emily's secrets to be revealed as the book progressed.

I also loved that basically all the main characters of this book had the same name as me. Emilys united!

So this book is about a young girl whose parents are brutally murdered when she is just a little baby. She basically goes into what I think is witness protection and is moved around a lot throughout her child and teen years. Every person she gets close to gets killed at some point so she distances herself from everyone by being a complete and total bitch. She believes that it is her parent's murderer that is following her and making sure she is never allowed to find friends or any kind of companionship.

I stan an unlikable female character. Especially when there is a backstory as to why they intentionally make themselves unlikable.

This book is also formatted to be Emily's journal which made it a very personal read!

The setting for this book is this really cool school called Hawthrone and its basically a place were girls go to develop their specific passions. There is no forced learning and the girls can choose what they want to specialize in and focus their efforts on that. I love the open idea of learning that this presents. It seems to give the students the freedom to independently learn and learn in the ways that work best for them.

Emily has found a home here because it is secluded and she is mostly left to her own devices to continue her studies of Emily Dickinson and her poetry. I didn't know much about Emily Dickinson before this, but I learned a few cool facts about her and her life which was really cool. Emily's quiet, secluded safe places becomes less safe when someone is murdered in the woods on campus.

Emily thinks it is the same person that has been following her whole life and continues to push everyone farther away from her. Everyone is happy to oblige except a new girl named, M.

Her name is also Emily! This pleases me.

I had no idea going into this book that it had a F/F relationship. I started guessing about halfway through the book, I think, that it was going to end up that way and I was right. I loved the way it was done. Everything about the two characters getting together was so natural. There was no struggle to it. There was no judgement to it. Because it was an all girls school, the only mention of it even being a little bit different is when the head mistress said she had never had to enforce bedroom rules and things like that before. I loved it and it was very slow burn. It took them forever to act on these feelings because Emily refused to let anyone get close to her, no matter how much M seems to thwart her plans.

The end of this book had me on the edge of my seat. I honestly didn't see it coming and I was kind of freaked out because I had just listened to a podcast that featured a similar real life case. I was fascinated by this plot twist though. I won't spoil anything.

Please read this book. It's a murder mystery/thriller with a F/F relationship that is slow burn. There is a little bit of an underlying theme of dark academia. I really enjoyed this book from how it was written to the plot twist at the end.

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2.5 stars
A friend of mine really loved this book so I thought I would read it. I had really high expectations for it going in and was excited since it seemed like a murder book. It turns out this book is not really a murder book at all. There was some talk of murder in the beginning and end but nothing like promised in the description.
Some things I liked about the book were the setting, the historical elements, the flashbacks to the childhood of the main character, and obviously the cover. This 2.5 stars
A friend of mine really loved this book so I thought I would read it. I had really high expectations for it going in and was excited since it seemed like a murder book. It turns out this book is not really a murder book at all. There was some talk of murder in the beginning and end but nothing like promised in the description.
Some things I liked about the book were the setting, the historical elements, the flashbacks to the childhood of the main character, and obviously the cover. This book takes place at a boarding school in the woods in California, I think. I love this type of setting and it was described really well. Since the main character is obsessed with Emily Dickinson there are lots of facts about her life. I found this interesting since I like history but it didn't really add to the story much. The flashbacks to the main characters life before were also nice since that was where the murder really happened and they helped explain why Emily was the way she was. Of course the thing that bumped this up to 2.5 stars was the cover. It is just so beautiful and I love how it uses elements from the book in an artsy and organized way. I would rate the cover 5 stars since it looks so good and different from other book covers I have seen. I hope there are no alternate covers for this book because this needs to be admired in all it's beauty. I guess this just shows how you can't judge a book by it's cover.
I didn't really like how unfocused this book was on murder. That is fine in a book, but this seemed to be advertised as such a murdery book, with the blood stains on the inside cover and the dramatic blurb. It seemed as if murder was just used to grab the reader's attention and wasn't really the main element of the story. Another thing that annoyed me was all of the Emily Dickinson poetry since I don't really like poetry, I just skipped past it. The plot was also pretty slow and mainly focused on the feelings of Emily and her relationship with M. It was just too slow and nothing really happened, which made it too boring to really care about. There is too much boring dialogue and thoughts with nothing really happening. Stuff did happen at the end but that was so fragmented and confusing it didn't feel action packed or suspenseful.
I think some people might like this book but I was just so disappointed since it did not deliver the murder it promised to. Just know that the plot is pretty slow and there isn't much story or big events in it. ...more

Emily Stone's life was chaos. Someone was brutally murdering anyone who got too attached to her. Her life was uprooted after a string of murders and she's been relocated to a boarding school for creative, artistic minds. That was the premise basically laid out in the first few chapters of the book. I was fairly interested at that point, hoping for a fascinating struggle about this girl figuring out who's behind these murders.

However, part 1 (Notebook 1) is basically her struggling to stay isola

However, part 1 (Notebook 1) is basically her struggling to stay isolated after another murder. There's no puzzling, or thrilling endeavors. It doesn't feel like the 'brutal murder' premise that is set up in the very beginning. I followed along for the first half, mainly because I appreciated Emily's character. Nonetheless, part 2 begins and it all went downhill for me. Emily's character development flat-lined. I couldn't follow the broken "chapter" segments, and there was no time allotted for the murder except for a small tangent nearing the end of the book. I found the plot disappointing, and the summary was totally made me expect something different than what I got. Perhaps if the premise had been different, I could've enjoyed the book. But when looking for a murder/thriller, I would like to find a murder/thriller. And I didn't, if that wasn't clear.

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Feb 22, 2021 Hank Young rated it really liked it

I really liked this book. I also see why people didn't, but hear me out.
I love character driven novels and this did just that. The characters were complex and had significant growth throughout the book that was satisfying and realistic.
I think I picked this book up because I also have a strange connection to Dickinson. I thought the author did a great job explaining the myths and legends of Dickinson and showing the truth behind the mystery.
I really liked every character, even the villain.
If I really liked this book. I also see why people didn't, but hear me out.
I love character driven novels and this did just that. The characters were complex and had significant growth throughout the book that was satisfying and realistic.
I think I picked this book up because I also have a strange connection to Dickinson. I thought the author did a great job explaining the myths and legends of Dickinson and showing the truth behind the mystery.
I really liked every character, even the villain.
If you don't like diary formats, you probably won't care for this. But if you don't mind you should check it out and give it a chance.
I think Deborah has great potential and I cant wait to see what she comes up with next. ...more

Jun 11, 2020 Darryl rated it it was ok

Ny comments are purely my personal reaction. Others may love this book. I didn't. The premise is very good and very intriguing. But this was literary fiction of the most excruciating type. The book was almost completely character driven. Plot wise, very little actually happened. The actual prose was well written, but the presentation was extremely disjointed. This seems to have been deliberate. This device is used very effectively in some books. Here it was in my view totally overdone and more f Ny comments are purely my personal reaction. Others may love this book. I didn't. The premise is very good and very intriguing. But this was literary fiction of the most excruciating type. The book was almost completely character driven. Plot wise, very little actually happened. The actual prose was well written, but the presentation was extremely disjointed. This seems to have been deliberate. This device is used very effectively in some books. Here it was in my view totally overdone and more frustrating than clever.

I was left with a feeling of disappointment.

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I liked the premise of the book. It started well enough, but I quickly grew tired of the bits and pieces of Emily Dickenson's work. The pace of reading the book was slowed down because of it. I was more than happy when the narrator wrote that she would be telling the story in her own words. I enjoyed the story in the end. I would not re-read the book and would recommend it to someone if they truly enjoyed classic American poets. I liked the premise of the book. It started well enough, but I quickly grew tired of the bits and pieces of Emily Dickenson's work. The pace of reading the book was slowed down because of it. I was more than happy when the narrator wrote that she would be telling the story in her own words. I enjoyed the story in the end. I would not re-read the book and would recommend it to someone if they truly enjoyed classic American poets. ...more

Jul 16, 2021 Deborah rated it did not like it

I wouldn't have minded if this were summarized as a novel in which a standoffish girl befriends someone else through a shared passion for Emily Dickinson while daydreaming about Emily Dickinson. THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A MURDER MYSTERY. Everyone close to her is supposed to die. 200 goddamn pages. She hasn't done a thing but remember. No sign her actual stalky/murdery type makes no sign.

THIS STORY HAS NO STORY. Unbearably dull and misleading.

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Aug 18, 2018 Jean rated it really liked it

The novel is written as Emily's diary, mostly in little shortish entries that begin with a line of poetry from Emily Dickinson. It can get really broken up, especially as Emily gets more distressed, so it's important to pay attention, but it's always possible to figure things out, even if it takes a little while. I was wondering how the mystery could possibly be resolved, and the suspense is pretty terrific, but it does become clear and has a satisfying conclusion. I thought it all came together The novel is written as Emily's diary, mostly in little shortish entries that begin with a line of poetry from Emily Dickinson. It can get really broken up, especially as Emily gets more distressed, so it's important to pay attention, but it's always possible to figure things out, even if it takes a little while. I was wondering how the mystery could possibly be resolved, and the suspense is pretty terrific, but it does become clear and has a satisfying conclusion. I thought it all came together really well. Markus is also just a good writer -- she's not clichéd or muddled or bland, but clear and thoughtful and just good to read, and the Emily Dickinson obsession is an integral part of the story, not tacked on. YA fans should pay attention. ...more

Loved the premise, and it was interesting learning more about Emily Dickinson, (and Saint Lucy!) First quarter was great, then it started to feel repetitive, and dragged a bit. Narrative seemed to jump around a bit in the latter quarter of the book, not sure if that was intentional, as a nod to E.Dickinson?

Apr 22, 2021 Emma Cross rated it really liked it

Okay, I thought this was really cleverly written. I was kept in the dark as a reader and didn't have the full picture until everything came to a culmination at the end. What a unique story. Honestly the only reason why this isn't 5 stars is it's just not what I would consider "my type of book", but for what it is, it was good.

I loved the writing and the weaving of Emily Dickinson throughout. I enjoyed the suspense of wondering what was going on and who was the villain, but I'm not sure I understood what happened by the time I finished the book. I wanted to know more about what really happened to her parents. I got really confused at the end about who was speaking and who the villain REALLY was.

Jun 16, 2020 kelsey rated it it was ok

DNF because it was SO slow, but skimmed because it had potential.

Loved the setting and the Emily Dickinson info. Didn't love the general plot or the aggressive love interest - being a girl pursuing a girl doesn't make it okay to be so PUSHY and make someone uncomfortable.

This is one of the worst executions of a plot I've ever read, including the format of the story. Additionally the narrator/main character vacillates between martyrdom and meanness, using the excuse of people around her being murdered. Anything else I say would be piling on.

Jan 09, 2019 LJ rated it liked it

The ending was a bit anticlimactic but overall it was a good read

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. Queer content: f/f relationship shoehorned in at the last minute, out of nowhere

Oct 15, 2021 Shannon rated it it was amazing

An absolutely gorgeous novel that I couldn't put down An absolutely gorgeous novel that I couldn't put down ...more

Aug 27, 2019 sandy rated it did not like it

uhhh this book was awful. literally nothing happened ??, ever??? the main character is annoying and whiny and literally 300 pages is just her walking around complaining and whining which. i get it. everyone u have ever loved has been murdered and u r afraid of getting close to anyone bc of that but this !! IS SIPPOSED TO BE A MYSTERY AND THERE IS NONE OF THAT. the killers reveal is so anticlimactic and the motive made absolutely no sense. it sounded like something i would have written in 4th gra uhhh this book was awful. literally nothing happened ??, ever??? the main character is annoying and whiny and literally 300 pages is just her walking around complaining and whining which. i get it. everyone u have ever loved has been murdered and u r afraid of getting close to anyone bc of that but this !! IS SIPPOSED TO BE A MYSTERY AND THERE IS NONE OF THAT. the killers reveal is so anticlimactic and the motive made absolutely no sense. it sounded like something i would have written in 4th grade and thought i was so clever for SKSKKKS . M is annoying and their relationship ??? was so weird and rushed?? also why is every character in this book named emily i - anywho this book SUCCKS sksksnsn ...more

Oct 25, 2018 Elizabeth rated it really liked it

3.5 stars, rounded up.

I don't really know what to say about this. I enjoyed it, but I honestly can't say it left a huge impression on me. This book is part murder-mystery and I really didn't feel like that was wrapped up particularly well. The f/f romance (Emily is a lesbian) is okay, but there was something about it that I found kind of lacking; it just didn't have that spark.

The whole time reading this I couldn't help but think of that quote from Wide Sargasso Sea : "names are important".

3.5 stars, rounded up.

The whole time reading this I couldn't help but think of that quote from Wide Sargasso Sea : "names are important". There was certainly a heavy emphasis on names in this book, what they mean to yourself/others and the power they can have.

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Letting Go Then Letting Go Again And Again No Saint Jennifer

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